Updates of my mediocre lifeee.

The month of December flashed by all too quickly. To think that I had problems recalling waht I did on Xmas which was just a week ago.=X Hmm, yeap, went to celebrate with tml and jefflan and friends in settlers cafe. I must say that its really quite fun!=) The more memorable ones were Charades.my fav game.heehee. Also played this funny contact game where we had to balance tiny balls with our fingers, connected to e fingers of the other players.

Theres this other game which was also really quite interesting. Test reaction. Images of hand-finger images in different postures were flashed and we had to manipulate our fingers to e exact same position shown on e card. Slowest one takes the card. The one with the most cards in e end is e loser. As usual, I was slowww.=( Brain reflexes not quick enough, man4 san1 pai1.Hai shi tml gou pen you, took half of the cardies from me!=P

Sometimes, I really wish I was cleverer..have quicker reaction to stimulus from my surroundings, more witty, more confident..less slowww, less blur, talk faster,react faster to jokes etc etc..! =( I really hate this aspect of myself though my cousin once told me tt that without all tis ting-dongs, i wouldnt be unique.PUI. haha. But to be honest, no one likes to be slow eh. Its just another way of consoling me. hatehatehatehate it. Since sec sch to the 23yrs Ive lived, ive always been what ive hated. To be honest, most of the times, i felt really inferior to my friends. why. cos reaction slowest. take longer time to understand stuff. am terrible in math. jokes that sent my friends into giggles would only result in a big "HUH" from me, which is where the source of post laughter came from!!! and I dont think fish helps. =( People say witty stuff to create entertainment, me? My reaction itself is a source of entertainment for my friends.=(

So...my 1st new year resolution of 2008: To find sources of stimulus that would make my brain react faster to situations!! one of the therapist told me tt gingko nut is good for memory, and so are blueberries. And ive bought cod liver oil during the robinson sale to grow my pea brain. Shall finish one bottle to see whether it works anot. PLS WAKE UP GIRL. slaps face* haha.

2nd resolution. To try and find peace within myself. Have been feeling so unsettled by everything in year 2007... its like what i thought would work out turned out otherwise and i have not been able to find a definite solution to my dilemma . I chose to "run away" from the problem, flitted here and there, trying to fit myself into many other different stuffs..and bury myself with an entirely diff field of work instead. Vunerable. Dunno where Im heading too. Sleepness nights sometimes. Moodswings that I hoped had not hurt my family as I dont meant it. Sorrie..Im really scared that after 23 more years, i would still be groping my way around, still unable to work towards success. not meaning a successful high flying career. So...in year 2008, I want to end my insecurity, want to find the strength that would carry me through..want mannnny pillar of supports..(greedy) be it just an ordinary life with an ordinary job, i just want to be at peace with myself.

3rd resolution. To lighten up. I was on duty during one of the days in december before xmas. Theres this Mr Frederick Horn whos a frequent guest of the hotel tt im working for. Hes an interesting person.=D At 1.92-5m tall, he towers over most of the people. Loves to cut his fringe almost every other day at the salon. Mind you, its 20-30 bucks for a fringe cut at our salon okay. And he does manicures and pedis too. Faints! A nice guy who likes to joke with the front desk people. During his 2nd stay, think I was into my 7th hr of duty that day, shagged and grumpy faced. He cracked a joke, but I think I frowned without me realising and he told me" Hey, relax, i was just kidding u know." And while i was getting some scrubs for him from the retail shop, he commented" hey, you are quite a serious person arent you? relax, life is too short to be serious/nervous..blah blah while speaking of his other spa experiences he had in Germany or something like that. " I think at that moment, I felt the barrier of guest and employee melting away momentarily. It was really amazing what a few words could do to change the atmosphere/ relationship between 2 people. I think tis is one of the fewwww satisfactions that I get from my job at the spa. I think that I'm actually starting to improve ald. The tennis coach commented that I looked really fierce when I dont smile. I dont mean how I looked if u know what I mean. Im just not the girl with sunshine smile. I mean no harm.=)

Flip thru my record books in pri and sec sch and u will see that in the 6 yrs and 4 yrs of pri and sec sch, quiet and reserved are the two words tt you will never fail to see in the comments field.

Shall stop at 3. Will update if I thinkof any more.heehee. Nights folks! And a Happy New Year to everyone!